It's been 20 years

I lost my dad exactly 20 years ago on this date, August 12, 1989. He passed away suddenly and very unexpectedly in our home. He had just turned 41 years old. I was so blessed to have him for the first 14 years of my life. I respected him greatly and loved him fiercely. It's kind of hard to describe just how wonderful he was...you just had to know him. He was funny, kind, a great joke-teller, a friend to everyone, loved to laugh, witty, outgoing, intelligent, compassionate....I could go on and on. He was loved by many and many mourned his passing.

Now that I am 34 and have lived most of my life without my dad, specific memories have faded and that makes me sad. But there are some things about him I won't forget: hearing him call me "Dah dah" (my nickname)...telling my brother and I to "di di mau" and "la dey" -lingo he picked up from his year in Vietnam which meant something like "let's get out of here" and "come here"(not sure about the spelling)...our eager anticipation for him to get in the swimming pool and do tricks on the diving board...skiing on his shoulders...riding on our boat and fishing off the docks of Lake Allatoona...his new Peachtree Road Race t-shirt every year...riding on dive boats on almost every vacation...the scar on his bicep from being wounded in Vietnam...the gap in his front teeth that he was self-concious about but he could shoot water through it farther than anyone I've ever seen..watching him interact with other people and always being friendly...him leaving money in my Granny's fridge because she wouldn't take it from him if he tried...eating dinner with my family every night...the great example he and my mom gave me of marriage...watching him play softball...wanting only him to comfort me when I broke my arm at one of his softball games...him teasing me when I started liking boys...his serious talks with me about growing up and trying to direct me along the right path.

The only regret I have is that I wish my peers had not had such an effect on me during those last years he was alive...I was more concerned about "being cool" than spending time with my parents (which was "uncool") and I missed opportunities to spend time with my dad and chances to give him affection in public because I was so worried about what my peers thought ("being socialized" is supposed to be a good thing, right?).

I wish I could have had my dad in my life longer, but I am so thankful God gave me 14 years...it could have been less. There are just so many things he has missed: seeing me and my brother graduate high school, me graduate from college, my wedding, my brother's wedding and the one that makes me the most sad, not getting to see his grandchildren. He would haved loved them to pieces and I hate that my kids are missing out on having him in their lives. But I was so blessed to know him and incredibly blessed to have him as my Dad. I love you Daddy, I miss you everyday!

Heading to Vietnam at 22 yrs old

Wish I knew more about this picture but he had a love for children even before me and my brother came along. This was during his tour of duty in Vietnam in 70-71.

My dad, brother and I sitting in my (maternal) Grandma's kitchen...I will always remember that wallpaper.

In our front yard, probably on our way to Lake Allatoona.

My dad teaching me how to swim.

My dad was employed at Delta Airlines for 19 years. This is how I will always remember him, looking like this.

Probably the last picture ever taken of me with my dad. This was June 1989 in the Bahamas. Little did we know we only had two more months with him. I don't remember who took this picture but I do remember having it taken. Funny how you remember certain things...